About Me

I can't remember as a child a time when I didn't go to church. I think I was "saved" at 12 but everytime I sinned I felt like I had to start all over again so I was never sure exactly when I was "saved". Then after my very rebellious college years, I finally began to get serious about my faith because I'd proven that a life of wanton sin was too painful and disillusioning to continue.

It took God about three more years after college to bring the perfect man into my life. Dale and I were married in 1994. If we had known then the path that God had laid out before us, I'm not sure we would have signed up for the journey.

Through the next eight years we lost all of our 6 remaining grandparents, Dale's dad and even miscarried one child. Dale went through too many bank mergers and buyouts to count and even the loss of one job, but God was always faithful. During this time, my spiritual growth was steady sometimes and non-existent at others, but I continued to serve in many different roles at our large church in Indianapolis and truly did just want to be the person that God created me to be. I'm just not sure I knew exactly who that was.

Looking back, I was always successful in volunteering and usually was placed in a role of leadership because of my personality and skills at organizing. Plus, I'm a slightly task-oriented person. But I now see that every endeavor I put my hand to, it was me doing at least 95% of the work or more and letting God make up the difference. Yet, I was good at what I did, so I forged ahead.

But eventually, God brought me to a place of understanding that my primary role was as a wife, then as a mother and homeschooler and then, to others outside of our family. While I still believe this to be true, we now view service, volunteering and ministry as a family vital. No longer does Mom go out and serve while Dad stays home and watches the kids or they stay home and entertain themselves.

In 2004 we began a leg of this journey that we would never wish upon anyone. My dad was convicted of committing a felony that none of his family could have ever believed he would commit. While details are not necessary to express the depth of pain, depression, grief, etc. that we went through...my Abba (Dad) in Heaven allowed me to wallow for awhile and then used this situation to transform how I saw Him and how I view others. There were also others that we were able to stand beside and encourage during their "dark days" because they knew we understood. Thankfully, my own dad did repent and he and my mom stand together as different people than the ones I grew up with. God has truly worked a miracle in all of our lives.

But in 2006, we again faced the buyout of a bank and for some time, we had felt Holy Spirit leading us to "something big". We eventually discovered that it was a move to a new job and a new life in Northern Kentucky/Cincinnati area. The week after we moved in, we walked into a church where we knew we had been divinely led and the first week the pastor spoke on "Authenticity". He was speaking our language. This was exactly what we had been looking for in the two previous years but was sorely missing from many of the "Christian" relationships we had.

That group of people eventually became a new church plant and we instantly signed up to participate in this big adventure. We haven't always known how to find our footing or understood our purpose in this group, but we know God has us with this community of believers to teach us about living in relationship as the Body of Christ.

In December 2008, when Dale was told he was part of a group designated for layoff within six weeks time, the Holy Spirit resonated within my soul, "This is it. This is your next big test." I wish I could say I've always passed, but this blog is testimony to my many doubts and sometimes waivering faith. Throughout 2009 as we struggled not just financially but also emotionally and spiritually, we saw how others could not possibly comprehend the questions we had and thus, sometimes didn't know how to support us. Emotional and spiritual support was most what we needed and that's what people didn't know how to give.

Eventually as we lost everything, we also lost respect and credibility in the eyes of many. Isolation was not something we anticipated while going through our situation. I now see this as a grace of God. Stripping us down to complete dependence upon Him not just financially, but also emotionally and spiritually, is a consequence I would not trade for the world. Again, just when we needed it God brought new friends into my life and restored old friendships that were once dear to me. In His timing, we have crossed paths with exactly the right people at exactly the right time.

From this point, you can read through the blog posts to know how the rest of the journey has been going. It is not perfect, sometimes satan even tells me it is not fair, but I can say with absolute confidence that everything we have been through has brought us to a place where we can stand beside single moms and truthfully say, 'We have stared into the pits of despair and seen there is a Light pointing the way out.' We can affirm to these ladies that there is Someone standing beside them when it seems like they're all alone.

I don't have confirmation, but I somehow feel like these near 43 years of training, refining and going through hard time after hard time was just the beginning to the second half. Please check in from time to time...I can just feel that He is only getting started. Our God is so great! What will He be able to do with a family of six that is surrendering everything and becoming completely sold out and yielded to His absolutely perfect will for their lives? I don't know, but about 2000 years ago He turned the world upside down with just 11 men...I humbly submit that we're over half-way there!

"Saddle up your horses
We got a trail to blaze.
Through the wild blue yonder of God's amazing grace.
Let's follow our Leader
Into the glorious unknown.
This is a life like no other--
This is The Great Adventure" --Steven Curtis Chapman, "Great Adventure"