Doubt.
If you back up and look at posts over the last month or so, you'll remember how I've been struggling. But last Thursday, I shared how I was going to be Hanging On and not letting go of God, no matter what. Well guess what? As He always does...He provided once again. Truly...I am deeply ashamed at my lack of faith. The words of the father who wanted his son to be healed by Jesus echo frequently within my heart and mind. "I believe...Forgive my unbelief!" Yep, I quoted it many times over the last week.
And the theme that keeps coming back over and over again, is ceaseless praise. Scripture says to do it in many places and last week I had to "just do it". Whether I felt like it or not...whether we had what we need or not...whether God was obvious or not...I just had to make myself praise Him. I know He's teaching me this lesson of "praising Him for who He is and not for what He does." I'm just struggling to learn the difference.
After all, what He does is so closely tied to who He is that I can't always tell where one ends and the other begins. For example, He loves us and chooses grace instead of zapping us with lightning bolts when we sin. Well, I should praise Him because God is Love...but honestly, I praise Him because of what He does in this example. I guess, I'm actually praising Him for what He doesn't do...zap me. That's a simplistic example maybe, but hopefully, you get the idea.
Bottom line...I chose to hang on and not let go and some days that involved simply thanking Him for a comfy bed; non-stylish clothes on my back; food on the table; an old van with a little gas in it; a good day of home schooling the kids and so many free schooling resources on the Internet; that the electricity was still on and we could choose to even use the A/C; that we are within walking distance of our bank and a grocery store if we need it; that my husband has stuck with me all these years even though I'm a tough bird to live with; and that even though times are tough...we're still richer than at least 50% of the world.
Comparing myself to the standard set by this culture will never bring contentment. Instead, I was already taking the advice of Habakkuk 3:17-19a and not coincidentally, it was one of the references for Jesus Calling that I read a few days ago:
"Though the fig tree should not blossom
And there be no fruit on the vines,
Though the yield of the olive should fail
And the fields produce no food,
Though the flock should be cut off from the fold
And there be no cattle in the stalls,
Yet I will exult in the LORD.
I will rejoice in the God of my salvation.
The Lord God is my strength..."
Lesson for the summer? No matter the circumstances...still I will praise Him!
Amen!
If you back up and look at posts over the last month or so, you'll remember how I've been struggling. But last Thursday, I shared how I was going to be Hanging On and not letting go of God, no matter what. Well guess what? As He always does...He provided once again. Truly...I am deeply ashamed at my lack of faith. The words of the father who wanted his son to be healed by Jesus echo frequently within my heart and mind. "I believe...Forgive my unbelief!" Yep, I quoted it many times over the last week.
And the theme that keeps coming back over and over again, is ceaseless praise. Scripture says to do it in many places and last week I had to "just do it". Whether I felt like it or not...whether we had what we need or not...whether God was obvious or not...I just had to make myself praise Him. I know He's teaching me this lesson of "praising Him for who He is and not for what He does." I'm just struggling to learn the difference.
After all, what He does is so closely tied to who He is that I can't always tell where one ends and the other begins. For example, He loves us and chooses grace instead of zapping us with lightning bolts when we sin. Well, I should praise Him because God is Love...but honestly, I praise Him because of what He does in this example. I guess, I'm actually praising Him for what He doesn't do...zap me. That's a simplistic example maybe, but hopefully, you get the idea.
Bottom line...I chose to hang on and not let go and some days that involved simply thanking Him for a comfy bed; non-stylish clothes on my back; food on the table; an old van with a little gas in it; a good day of home schooling the kids and so many free schooling resources on the Internet; that the electricity was still on and we could choose to even use the A/C; that we are within walking distance of our bank and a grocery store if we need it; that my husband has stuck with me all these years even though I'm a tough bird to live with; and that even though times are tough...we're still richer than at least 50% of the world.
Comparing myself to the standard set by this culture will never bring contentment. Instead, I was already taking the advice of Habakkuk 3:17-19a and not coincidentally, it was one of the references for Jesus Calling that I read a few days ago:
"Though the fig tree should not blossom
And there be no fruit on the vines,
Though the yield of the olive should fail
And the fields produce no food,
Though the flock should be cut off from the fold
And there be no cattle in the stalls,
Yet I will exult in the LORD.
I will rejoice in the God of my salvation.
The Lord God is my strength..."
Lesson for the summer? No matter the circumstances...still I will praise Him!
Amen!
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