I Was Warming My Hands...

Often my words are not enough to express what I'm feeling. So today, I'm going to borrow Sara Groves' words instead.

Jeremiah

Jeremiah, tell me 'bout the fire
That burns up in your bones.
I wanna know, I wanna know more now.

The burning of ambition and desire
It never could come close to that fire.
To that fire.

I was looking to myself
And I forgot the power of God
I was standing with a sparkler in my hand.

I stood so pround and profound
You came and burned this whole place down
Now that's fire!

Jeremiah, tell me 'bout the fire
That burns up in your bones.
I wanna know, I wanna know more now.

The burning of ambition and desire
It never could come close to that fire.
To that fire.

I was caught up in this vice
And it's power to entice
I was dwelling on my hopelessness and doubt.

With the slightest invitation
You came with total damnation
Now that's fire.

Jeremiah, tell me 'bout the fire
That burns up in your bones.
I wanna know, I wanna know more now.

Jeremiah, tell me 'bout the fire
'Cause nothing could come close to that fire
To that fire.

I was warming my hands by this little light of mine
Now I know, I know it's time
To come in from the cold

Fight fire with fire
Fan the flame
Come stir up these coals in my soul
My soul
Till it burns out of control.

Jeremiah, tell me 'bout the fire
That burns up in your bones.
I wanna know, I wanna know more now.

Jeremiah, tell me 'bout the fire
'Cause nothing could come close to that fire
To that fire.


The three lines that speak to me the most, I've put in bold text. As Holy Spirit did yet another huge thing yesterday, and today I hear this song on my Ipod, I'm reminded of how when I'm not solely living through the power of the Spirit of Jesus...I'm just "standing with a sparkler in my hand".

Wow! Don't you want His Fire?!! Can't you feel that you were meant for so much more than just "warming my hands by this little light of mine"?

Yesterday, I was going through my morning routine of prayer and Bible study and as I finished the lesson, I had a STRONG urge to do another session. So I told the kids it would be yet another easy day of school because I needed to do some more Bible study. Oh Abba! You KNEW just what I needed.

The session was entitled "A Clean Slate". And by the end of it, Beth Moore asked me to seek God's leading on if there is anyone in my life to whom I am a stumbling block. Matthew 5:23-24, I'd always interpreted and had been preached to me that this passage was if someone had offended me, I need to go deal with it so I'm not harboring a grudge while I'm trying to worship God at the same time. But Moore explains the passage as I am the offender...maybe even unknowingly and I need to attempt to reconcile.

She has you pray for the Spirit's leading to discern to whom you are a stumbling block in their path of freedom through Jesus. As soon as I prayed this, someone came to mind. And it's a person that for a few years now I have invited to call, e-mail or write me so we can discuss what has happened. Honestly, I don't know how I've offended them...but it's obvious that I have.

So in obedience to the Spirit, I wrote out a letter asking their forgiveness for however I have offended them and encouraged them to talk to me about it so we can name it and root it out. Ultimately, I shudder to think that I am someone's stumbling block. But in this instance, I'm certain I am.

What will come of this? I have no clue. They could continue to ignore me, lash out at me or pretend like nothing's ever happened...but I'm not responsible for their reaction. [No matter what you think of Dr. Phil...I did get some wise advice from his show several years ago...'You are only responsible for speaking the truth. You are not responsible for how it is received.']

I just know I had to obey the Spirit's calling and I had to write the truth...in love. As Moore writes, "Obeying God is paramount." And as shared in the letter to this person...I know the relationship will be different. But as I've seen in my marriage and in my relationship with my parents, when God redeems it, the relationship can be better than you ever dreamed possible. In fact, if I'm a stumbling block to this person...the Holy Spirit longs for the relationship to be different. Right?

All of this happened and gave me great peace in knowing that daily, Holy Spirit is moving and working and doing HUGE things in my life and our family. That's why I no longer want to be content with "Warming my hands by this little light of mine." Holy Spirit is stirring the coals in my soul, I'm coming in from the cold and He is fanning His flame. Get ready for a bonfire! That's what He wants for us! His power, His glory, His love, His mercy!

Now that's fire!

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