Is it REALLY this easy?

Up front, I will affirm that there are times when I have longed to hear the Voice of the Holy Spirit and have gone many, many weary days and weeks without hearing Him. Today though, I need to give Him praise for when He speaks...clearly. Sometimes, so clearly that I even think "Is it really this easy?"

This morning has been one of those times.

Don't get me wrong...I have done nothing to deserve this. I haven't been diving into Scripture. I haven't worn callouses on my knees and I don't have any magic formula to offer you. I believe He's always calling (see John 12:32) to each of us. Speaking for myself, I am at times more receptive than others. 

Apparently, first thing this morning...I was listening.

I awoke with thoughts of one of my garden beds. It's up against the house and isn't going to get enough sun for the vegetables I've placed there. I've read about reflective light and even used some on my patio garden last year. While I'm contemplating this, I have a "sense" that I should arise and take a walk. 

I am not the most physically fit person you'll ever meet. But when we moved into a more urban setting, I took a cue from Mission Year's practices to start walking. It's difficult to meet your neighbors from your car. I'm calling my early-morning-intentional-prayer-and-devotional-walk, a "Jesus walk". So the sticky note on the kitchen wall is what I leave for the kids on my way out the door.

Today, I didn't head toward the cemetery (see photos on Instagram) for perspective, instead I felt a "nudge" to go a different direction toward Latonia's downtown. I'm walking along, enjoying the morning, conversing with Jesus, hearing the trash truck in the Monday morning background and I pass this...

or I should say "these"...because there were two of them...laying next to a trash can about 1/3 of a mile from our house.

To be honest, I saw...I looked...and I kept walking for a few paces and had that little brain nudge that I don't know how to explain to someone who hasn't had it. But what I heard myself say was "Is it really that easy?" Admittedly, I walked another block and a half trying to convince myself I actually was experiencing God's provision in this fantastic way!

If I've lost you, then back up to what was on my mind when I awoke this morning...reflective light use for my garden. Holy Spirit's promptings were discreet but apparent since I awoke and there...laying in a trash heap...was the answer.

For this to work though, two more things had to fall into place: I had to walk faster back to the house to beat the trash truck from getting them before I could come back with the van, which my husband couldn't have taken yet to go to work. As evidenced by the photo above, both worked out. Dale left a little later than usual, and I passed the garbage truck on my way back home after picking up the two mirrors!

Explaining to my husband what they're to be used for was entertaining for me and probably confusing for him...he's more of a I-need-to-see-it-to-understand-it kind of guy. All of this to say, I have my Pinterest-type project for the next few days.

As soon as I placed these mirrors on the front porch, I heard my thoughts expressing praise to the One who loves to give good gifts to His children, who longs to have us listen as He tells us ''this is the way, walk in it" (see Isaiah 30:21), and who even cares about the most seemingly insignificant details of our heart's desires that He somehow...unexplainably...puts so many pieces of this Giant-Jigsaw-Puzzle-of-Life together to bring a little reflective Light to our home.

I needed to share this with you this morning because I need to reflect His Light. He needs to shine out of me until the people around me see the glory of His Presence all over the place. The verse I've been trying to memorize each morning is appropriately timed for His teaching today, 

"Arise, shine, for your light has come, 

and the glory of the LORD rises upon you." (Isaiah 60:1)

Thanks for hanging out with me through this entire epistle. You see the last thing I heard as I headed down the stairs to start typing this lengthy tribute to my awesome God was "I have to share this or the rocks are going to cry out...and I don't want any rocks speaking for me!" (see Luke 19:40)

***********************************

Words of wisdom I'd love to leave with you on this amazing day, if you'll allow me the privilege of speaking into your life? 

Go.

Do your thing that you are passionate about and feel like you have to do.

Take Jesus, through the Holy Spirit, with you.

Listen.

And follow.

Amen.

I Am a Prodigal

When I was in Houston two weeks ago, I had a wonderful opportunity to attend church at St. John's Downtown. Pastor Steven taught from Luke 15:11-32. Most Christians know this as the story Jesus told (aka parable) called The Prodigal Son.

"I am the Prodigal Son every time I look for unconditional love where it cannot be found." That quote from Pastor Steven is something I have repeatedly returned to since I wrote it down. He asked the congregation if as sons and daughters of the King, we ever "cash in" our royalty for debauchery.

Good thoughts to ponder.

I liked what I saw and heard at St. John's. Their emphasis on loving people where they are has led them into extensive homeless ministry, AIDS activism, baptismal commitments where vows to fight injustice in ourselves and others are expected and depression/bi-polar support groups that would be taboo in some churches are promoted from the pulpit. All of this while encouraging youth to pursue academics, not athletics, as the way to escape from poverty, by providing college campus tours throughout the South.

But as I have contemplated Pastor Steven's words, perfectly timed today I read in The Joy of the Gospel, "At times we (the Church) have to be like the father of the prodigal son, who always keeps his door open so that when the son returns, he can readily pass through it...Frequently, we act as arbiters of grace rather than its facilitators. But the Church is not a tollhouse, it is the house of the Father, where there is a place for everyone, with all their problems."

As I struggled last Sunday with being judgmental and critical of many incongruities that I see in American Christians, I was ever so grateful that my Father was waiting with the door wide open. Why would I as His Prodigal Child ever close it for anyone else?

Pride

Anyone near-abouts my age might have started humming "In the name of love". But that wasn't necessarily the direction I thought I was headed with this post.

Or is it?

You see, I've been thinking about pride...as in the kind that 'goeth before the fall'. (see Proverbs 16:18) At least that's what all of us who grew up in the church were told that we needed to guard against, almost more than anything I can remember...with maybe the exception of sex.

But several years ago, before our downwardly mobile lifestyle began, God's Spirit specifically whispered the word 'humility' to me. I knew at the time that humility was my next big lesson. I just didn't realize how humbled by my circumstances I could become. How could I have known? I couldn't...plain and simple.

And while I've read cute little sayings that remind us 'humility is one of those things that as soon as you think you have it...you've lost it,' God's clarifying humility a little bit more for me. Or rather, He's shining His light on some wisdom and discernment that myself and many others need to remember.

Here's what I've been noticing:  We are so concerned and hyper-aware that we do not want to be prideful...we are denying the glory to God for the things He has done!

Can I get an 'Amen!'?

Allow me to elaborate.

When I spoke in our Bible study recently, I shared with the ladies a Bible verse that perfectly describes me. "They shall eager utter (or bubble over with) the memory of Your abundant goodness and will shout joyfully of Your righteousness." (Psalm 145:7)

If you give me a chance, I am going to fill your ear with God's goodness and His righteousness. That is just who I am. I'm almost to the point where I simply can't help it anymore. For someone that used to be so terrified to speak up regarding Jesus and His workings in my life, it is nothing but Him that causes His goodness to just roll right off my tongue. I wish everything that came from my mouth were always as good as Him. (But that lesson is for another post)

There was another result of the lesson I taught on that day though (and with the help of Emily Freeman's book, A Million Little Ways)...I realized, this is what I was born to do! 

Sharing God's grace, the Love of Jesus and the discernment of the Holy Spirit either through home schooling, teaching a Bible study, writing a blog or growing a garden (yes...in my brain, it does apply!)...this is what makes me feel ALIVE! And I'm no longer going to apologize for it...sweep it under the rug...try to be something I'm not...or "humbly" shy away from acknowledging how God has gifted me.

Every part of my being is oozing with His goodness and I want everyone to know it! 

With the help of Freeman's book...which I can only read in small doses because it is chock full of godly wisdom...God's Spirit is helping me overcome the fear of my "first thoughts". I shouldn't downplay my gifts. And it is not pride that keeps me from doing so. How do I know this? Because James 1:17 tells us that "every good thing given and perfect gift is from above, coming down from the Father of the lights with whom there is no variation or shifting shadow."

Thus, if my heart is surrendered to serving God my Father and He chooses to use the gifts He's given me, it is not prideful to acknowledge the gift and, in turn, give Him the glory. I have even recently heard some people leading up to sharing something that they did...as clearly prompted by the Holy Spirit...and yet, quickly skip over the gift they were able to give away to someone in need! I completely understand that they did not want to sound prideful...but God is the giver of everything we have; He alone prompts us to be giving and kind (that does not come from our Enemy...ever!); and if someone is blessed by that gift...we should not shy away from giving Him the praise.

I will caution that Jesus told us to give in secret (see Matthew 6:4). As someone that has been the recipient of many generous gifts, I almost think this is more to protect the weaker one on the receiving end than to protect the giver from pride. This way, the recipient owes no one. There is no "one-upmanship". There is no burden lurking between the two parties involved. In other words, no strings attached. Also, as the giver, it frees me from taking any credit.

But, admittedly, when I am comfortable and have a rock solid relationship with the one to whom I am giving, I love being able to say, 'I hope we're beyond having to do the secret thing and that you know this didn't come from me. It's from God.' One of my dear friends said to me, upon receiving a gift from her, that she just didn't want any weirdness between us. With the confidence of the Holy Spirit, I could tell her, "No weirdness here. I didn't ask for the gift and it was prompted by the Holy Spirit...so thanks for being faithful to do it." See...God is worthy of the credit, not us.

What might this look like then?

Obviously, I'm assuming that we're not bragging about the gifts we've given to someone in need...directly to their faces. But I don't see any pride in admitting to a friend or companion in Christ that "God gave us this extra blessing and I am thankful He prompted us to share it." It also means living out daily what He leads us to do by the power of His Holy Spirit...and not shoving it aside because it doesn't seem "practical" or it looks "foolish". It's okay to say "I don't take credit for _________________ (Insert gift or talent here). It's what God is working out in me so that I can be the person He created me to be."

It's that simple. God is given the praise. I don't know about you, but I don't ever want the rocks to have to cry out in my place. (see Luke 19:28-40) I'm even beginning to think that when we don't acknowledge how God has gifted us, that is more evidence of pride than anything.

Is it not selfishness and pride that would cause us to deny gratefulness and thankfulness for God's gifts to us?

So here's where I'm at in my processing of this question, What makes me feel alive? Well, obviously, I feel most alive when I am doing, saying and living out the gifts God has innately programmed me to have. My continued existence is proof that there is still something He has left for me to do for His Kingdom that is on Earth as it is in Heaven.

I'm tired of being deceived by my Enemy into somehow believing that it's prideful to want to live out these gifts. I am, quite frankly, exhausted at shoving these gifts to the periphery of my life when God's Spirit keeps trying to draw them out to the forefront, which is precisely where they should be. It's a spiritual "tug of war" that I didn't even realize I was waging until this past month.

It's time, my friends! 

Time to start coming alive, live out the Vision God has for your life and to stop apologizing for it! Augustine is quoted as saying, "The glory of God is man fully alive." We all keep saying with our mouths that we just want to glorify God...I think it's about time our lives looked like it too!

Are you ready?

Go!

I Dare You to Do This and...

not be humbled.

The folks over at A Heart for Korah posted a very eye-opening link on their Facebook page. It's called Global Rich List. It will ask you your location and then all you do is type in your annual income and it instantly evaluates your percentage of wealthiest people position. It also gives you the data in real number of people.

For instance, I put in our last year gross income and believe it or not, even with living 1.5 times below the poverty level for a family of 6 in the U.S., we were still in the top 1.10% of wealthiest people in the world.

Yikes!

That makes me about the 73.6 millionth richest person out of a world population of around 7 billion. Can you say the word shame? Not shame at what we have been blessed with...but my stupid whining at how little I have!

So I crunched a few numbers...just because I'm a little weird like that. Dale's had a lot of extra work this year, so our income has gone up considerably...still below poverty level, mind you. Yet, by my estimation we will have finished the year in the 0.51% or the 33.9 millionth richest person.

Oh yeah...you know I went further. I put in our income the last year that Dale worked in banking. Twice what we earned last year, but still only about $14,000 above poverty level for a family of 6. Here's the stats: 0.15% or about the 10 millionth richest person in the world. Can it be possible that that woman of five years ago actually thought she barely had enough to get by? Yes...double shame.

And then this is the last one...I promise...I put in $100,000. I don't know about you, but that sounds like a lot of money to me. But I know people that live in that pay range and even above. In fact, it's not that uncommon in the area where we live in Northern Kentucky/Cincinnati area. Here are the final figures. If you make $100,000 you are in the top 0.08% of the wealthiest people in the world! That also makes you about the 5 millionth richest person.

So here's the question that now has to be asked: If we are living as Red Letter Christians, and really, truly say we believe the teachings of Jesus...when He says, "From everyone who has been given much, much is required." (see Luke 12:48 in its context here) exactly to whom do we think He was talking? And what are we...myself at the forefront...going to do about it?

By the way...I lied when I said $100,000 was the last one. I want you to go over to Global Rich List right now and plug in your numbers. Then ask God what He wants you to do too.

If Only...

Throughout the first 16 verses in chapter 48 of the book of Isaiah, God reminds Israel how He will consistently fulfill the prophecies He had promised so they can not give credit to idols or any other excuse. He didn't have to tell them what He was going to do ahead of time...but He did, so they would know it is Him.

This chapter falls hot on the heels of all of His prophecies against Israel and how they will be carried into captivity by Babylon. He also specifically has named Cyrus of the Medo-Persian Empire 100 years before he is born and that he will be the one to conquer Babylon. God doesn't want any dispute...He says He will do it...and we know from history, that He was true to His word.

Then in verses 17 through 19 are the verses that shake me up every time I read them:

17 "Thus says the LORD, your Redeemer, the Holy One of Israel,
'I am the LORD your God, who teaches you to profit,
Who leads you in the way you should go.
18 If only you had paid attention to My commandments!
Then your well-being would have been like a river,
And your righteousness like the waves of the sea.
19 Your descendants would have been like the sand,
And your offspring like its grains;
Their name would never be cut off or destroyed from My presence." (Isaiah 48:17-19, NASB)

This past week, I was asking Why Doesn't the Simple Thing Work Anymore? I do believe our lack of suffering has great influence on our perceived need for a Saviour. But what does God say to Israel in the passage above? "If only..."

Yes, those commandments were essential to vitality, nourishment and life. Their descendants could never be counted "If only..." Can we apply this to ourselves and learn some lessons? Absolutely!

Think about this: We were all called to 'Go and make disciples, baptize them and teach them God's commandments'. (see Matthew 28:19-20) We were, by design...created to replicate our faith in others...a sort of "birthing", if you will. Why doesn't that happen in our lives until our spiritual descendants are "like the sand"? Is it only the Billy Grahams, the Chuck Swindolls and the Max Lucados that are destined to father so many spiritual children?

I don't think so.

And Jesus taught that the greatest two commandments summed up everything else that God commanded. Love the Lord, your God with all your heart, soul and might and Love your neighbor as yourself. (see Luke 10:27) These were the two at the top of the list and they were uncompromisable.

Maybe I'm taking the Scripture above too liberally...and simply...but, then again...maybe not. How do we point people to the Redeemer, the Holy One of Israel, bring innumerable others into the knowledge of God's saving Love so that their name will never end (a.k.a. eternal life)?

"If only..."

Treasure the Past

Today, which is Mother's Day in the U.S., our pastor used Luke 2:19 as the basis for his sermon:
"But Mary treasured all these things, pondering them in her heart."

What better example of motherhood can we study than the one who was honored with raising the Savior of the world? Pastor Marksberry had a lot of good points, but the one that spoke to me the most was something the Holy Spirit has been whispering too.

Treasure the past.

Over and over again, I read the posts of this blog to remind myself of what God has done in the recent past...His faithfulness, His love, His provision and even His discipline. As much as I like to share what is happening in my life with others, first and foremost this blog is for me. I started it when I was "bubbling over" at the "memory of His abundant goodness." (Psalm 145:7) I just couldn't hold it all in anymore. Writing that much by hand in a journal was causing hand cramps (no joke!) and most of the people I knew at the time didn't want to sit with me long enough to listen to what was happening inside of me. I was thankful for the few that would listen, but there was just too much to share. Instead, I chose to start this online journal and just let the words be sent "out there" into the world of the internet. If anyone read them, much less was blessed by what I was writing...that was just a huge bonus.

While I was listening to today's sermon, I felt like it was my turn to encourage you...the potential reader of this...to start your own version of documenting all that God does in your life. I know some that share through Facebook or Twitter. Others keep their own personal journals. You could even write in the margins of your Bible or devotional book a date and a note pertaining to specific Scriptures and how God used them to speak into your life through comfort, encouragement, grace or wisdom. Truly, in our media-rich world...the possibilities are endless. Mary had to be content with storing them up in her heart. She may have not even been able to write for all we know.

Now, it's your turn...it is time to do your part and it's okay if you don't make them public. But whether we want to admit our limited mortality or not, there will be a day when we will shuffle off this imperfect shell. What a blessing to leave behind for those that follow after you all of the lessons, passion, and gifts God gave you. Can you think of a better "legacy" to leave?

Sad to See it Happen

Friday afternoon, I called my mom regarding a simple question. She said, "I guess you've had the TV on, right?" I hadn't. She proceeded to tell me about the school shooting that took place in Newtown, Connecticut. I literally felt sick to my stomach. This is a more recent experience for me. As God breaks my heart for the things that break His, I have come to feel almost nauseous when faced with great evil.

Unfortunately, the nausea continued as I began scrolling through my Facebook newsfeed.

After last Friday's events in Connecticut, social media naturally lit up with comment after comment. Some expressed grief, many expressed thoughts and prayers for the victims and community but too many waded into the fray of comments that just should not have been made. I was at first angered...now, I'm mostly sad.

By Friday evening, I considered complete abstinence from Facebook for a week or so...but I have hesitantly continued to read through posts regarding the shooting deaths. Whether you want guns or want them destroyed...want prayer in schools or think no mention of God should ever cross the threshold of a public education facility...want to blame evil on the violence on TV and video games, lack of appropriate parenting, lack of mental health treatment, lack of support for the parents that have children with mental health issues...etc, etc, etc. Can I just be maybe the one person who says, "This is not what needs to be shared during this time!"?

Can we stop grinding our axes and just remember that "every inclination in the human heart is evil" (Genesis 8:21)? Stop blaming one faction or another. Stop tearing apart the side that doesn't agree with you. Stop walking right into the camp of the enemy and allowing him to build walls that are increasingly higher and higher between those that call themselves Christians and those that don't.

What should we say? What should we share?

Love...pure and simple.

Love will cause you to cry with the victims and grieve for the offender too. Love will make you wish to 'gather them up like a hen with her chicks' under her wings.' (Luke 13:34) Love will help you be quick to listen to those you don't agree with, slow to speak the wrong word and possibly even slower to express anger and things at people you don't understand. (James 1:19). Love will give you a "garment of praise instead of despair." (Isaiah 61:3) And because of your hope-filled Love, you will be asked to "give a reason" (I Peter 3:15) which will bless you with an opportunity to once again...you guessed it...share Love!

There were a whole lot of things I've been wanting to say or reply and I even shared a couple of the more frustrating comments I saw with my husband. But I knew the best thing I could do was to hold off and wait for God's response...not mine! And this morning...I heard it...this song. I've actually heard it in my head a lot this weekend, but was thankful that God's Spirit gave it to me one more time this morning...just to make the point to me again.

What do we (I) need to say when evil seems to prevail and so many are seeking answers? Really the only thing I can say is the one and only thing that will matter in the end. What will be there in the end? Will it be guns or no guns, home school or public education, happy TV shows or violent ones, good or bad or no mental healthcare? No...the only thing that will be there in the end is "Oceans and oceans of Love and Love again."

I've shared this before, but although the video itself is not that great, the songs and words are truth. Listen to it and bask in His Love...that's right where He wants us anyway!

"You Will Always Fail"

Settle in...this could take a while.

I know a couple of ladies that have been regularly posting their friend's blog posts on Facebook. The reason they've been doing this is because this pregnant mom received a devastating diagnosis a few months ago...her baby has Trisomy 18. Aleisa's raw vulnerability, humility and courage to face another day have been awe-inspiring to behold. I do not know her, but as evidenced by her blog, I believe she would give all credit to the Heavenly Father that has been carrying her. [To read the blog, click here I Will Carry You ]

Baby Nora was born on Tuesday the 17th, and as evidenced by the Facebook posts that were circulating that day, I believe hundreds of people have been praying for this family and this tiny little fighter that lived through a miracle, just by living through her birth. As I've been reading through the posts, one thought that's occurred a few times is "What would I do?" But Tuesday, as I kept going back to the blog to find out how things had turned out and just being amazed at this family's courage to share their heartbreak with the world, I was almost numb thinking about this burden they've had to bear.

Then yesterday, as a friend of their family posted some amazing birth photos and I was once again awed at the beauty of exactly what God has done in their lives, my thought was, "I can not imagine!" And the Voice I know so well and love so much said, "And that is why you will always fail."

Strange, I know, to give credit for this to the Holy Spirit but I know it was Him because instead of feeling condemned, judged or shamed...I only felt peace, assurance and light-weighted freedom! I knew exactly what He was saying...but it's taken several hours to be able to put it into words.

"I can't imagine"...what this family is going through, what a single mom faces every day, what a rebellious teen does to his parents' souls, what having a cheating husband who promises to change yet doesn't feels like, what it means to feel starvation, malnutrition, homelessness, molestation, abuse...the list goes on and on and on. And my loving, Almighty, amazing God assures me that because I can't possibly imagine going through any of these...I will always fail.

I will fail to provide all of the grace, mercy, compassion, assistance, understanding, faith, persistence, peace and above all else, Love that is needed for any given situation. I am only human, there are absolute limits to what I can do. And I will fail by judging, condemning, questioning, distancing for fear of reprisals or association or lack of resources...not because I want to...but again, because I am human and every thought or action that comes forth from me is filtered through my limited experiences and understanding.

Why do I find freedom in my failure? Because the burden to "figure it all out" isn't mine! Amen!

This has been a theme for a few days, as just last week I heard Beth Moore's conclusion to one of the points in her Bible study of Esther. The previous week she'd shared that it's "Tough being a woman who feels responsible for the 'how.'" In the last listening session the Scriptures she used to dispel this burden were found in 2 Peter 2:9 and Psalm 103:14

"then the Lord knows how to rescue the godly from temptation, and to keep the unrighteous under punishment for the day of judgment" (2 Peter 2:9, NASB)

"for he knows how we are formed,

he remembers that we are dust." (Psalm 103:14, NIV)

I don't have to know how because God not only does, but He also knows how finite and limited I am. But do I always remember how finite and limited I am? No! So yes, there is freedom in knowing that I will fail!

I will fail to be everything that everyone needs me to be in every situation that they may ever experience. Ohhhh...but guess Who doesn't?

• "The LORD within her is righteous; he does no wrong. Morning by morning he dispenses his justice, and every new day he does not fail" (Zephaniah 3:5)
• "Lift up your eyes to the heavens", look at the earth beneath; the heavens will vanish like smoke, the earth will wear out like a garment and its inhabitants die like flies. But my salvation will last forever, my righteousness will never fail" (Isaiah 51:6) 
• "The LORD will guide you always; he will satisfy your needs in a sun-scorched land and will strengthen your frame. You will be like a well-watered garden, like a spring whose waters never fail" (Isaiah 58:11)
• "Because of the LORD’s great love we are not consumed, for his compassions never fail" (Lamentations 3:22)
• "For no word from God will ever fail" (Luke 1:37)

And the greatest of these?

• "Love never fails" (I Corinthians 13:8)

Amen! and Amen!

Royalty

You may have noticed that under my photo to the right the only description I've put to describe myself is "I'm a Daughter of the King!". I used to describe myself with a much longer and witty (or so I thought) paragraph of my interests, background and life-situation. But for some time now, I've been content to merely think of myself with these six simple words.

But are they simple?

If you really think through the implications, the profoundness of these six words, the depth...the breadth...and the power of these words is actually...limitless. One place to start is do I act like I'm a daughter of the King?

Most days...no...I don't. And as I've shared on here recently, I've been struggling a little with my relationship with the King. I don't blame Him. I know I'm not sitting alone with Him as much as I'd like. I know I've let stress, play and schedules get in the way of making Him my priority. When I do concentrate on spending alone and quiet time with Him...His peace prevails, He focuses my heart and I feel confidently empowered to face the day.

So why don't I live focused on being His daughter every day? Hmmm? That's a good question. I think there are too many answers to delve into here. But one of the primary ones is that the King has an Adversary who loves nothing more than to distract me with fear, doubt, worry, stress, daily mundaneness, satisfying my own pleasures, guilt and an overly saturated, steeped-armpit deep culture that provides endless opportunities to ignore the King.

Excuses aside, I'm thankful for the Beth Moore Esther study that a friend encouraged me to do. Esther was a queen and she was presented with a seemingly insurmountable task...save the entire Jewish race. This was no Schindler's List. There was no way to save anyone. They were all going to die. And did I mention that if she went to the king, her husband Xerxes, without first being invited...she could instantly be killed? If you've never read the book of Esther in the Bible, I encourage you to do so. It's brief and reading it is not only encouraging, but sounds like so many love stories or fairy tales that prevail in our culture.

And here's what spoke to my heart last week when I read it in the Bible study: I too am royalty, because I'm a daughter of the King. And I too have a purpose that God specifically has for me to do. The famous verse that includes "for such a time as this" applies to us all. We each have an amazing "for such a time as this" destiny to fulfill. The question is simply, will we obey and act on behalf of the King when He asks?

Truthfully, I might not...unless I remember that I'm a daughter of the King and it isn't I who live but Christ living in me and through me. (Galatians 2:20) But when I stand confidently as a daughter of the King, I can boldly and with the power of the Holy Spirit, accomplish any destiny He has placed before me. Honestly, it helps my attitude toward others as well. The comments, misinterpretations or stinging barbs of others somehow lose their "sting" when I know that I am fulfilling my purpose in God's royal family.

If you'd like to learn more, here are more Scriptures regarding God's kingdom and our place in it. Read them and let them wash over your soul...renewing and refreshing you for the journey ahead.

Matthew 11:11
Matthew 13:11
Luke 20-21
I Corinthians 4:20
I Peter 2:9
Revelation 1:6
Revelation 5:9-10

Come back to these Scriptures often. They'll strengthen you for the journey ahead and remind you that no task is mundane when you're a child of the King. Every act has the possibility of furthering the Kingdom and increasing the territory of the King...the question is will you hear His call and heed His will? That's what a child of the King would do. That's my prayer for myself and for you as well. So let's agree together in prayer to stop behaving like and allowing thoughts to rule us that are contradictory to a child of the King. Just think of the possibilities when we each rise up to fulfill our own destinies "for such a time as this!" Amen!

Mentioned in this post:

Suffering

Throughout the last month, there seems to be this common thread running through my thoughts, my Scripture readings and thus, these blog posts. Sometimes it's vague, sometimes it's obvious...but as I look back over the last four weeks...it's definitely there. The title of this post sums it up completely...suffering.

Now I don't exactly feel like I'm suffering at the moment, so I have to stop and ask the question: Why this theme? And why now?

You know, I wish I could say that every day I wake up with an absolutely clear vision of what my purpose, plan and even goals are for the day. But that's just not the way it works for me. More likely, I stumble my way through each day...attempting to keep my eyes open for how God is working and where He is leading...and hoping I understand and obey the lessons He wants to show me along the way.

So as I sit on this side of the last month and look back, this common theme rises to the surface. It's there in when I was reminded to be Thankful for the Privilege and even in the movies I watched like Slumdog Millionaire. When I shared how I felt parched in Isaiah 58. I know that may not seem like suffering, but it is a "privation" of sorts. Anytime I'm not fully standing in the Love of my Abba, my soul is in some way suffering.

And again, when feeling distant and far from God...like standing at the bottom of the Grand Canyon, the deprivation can be unbearable because I have experienced the feeling of being as close as His shadow. In the absence of that, there is pain. While even contemplating a Christmas unit study with my kids, the plight of our fellow man and our response to it, rose to the surface as I picked A Christmas Carol for our curriculum.

Finally, Andrew Peterson's music has provided great encouragement in the face of The Silence of God, while Dancin' in the Minefields and the promise that There WILL be a Last One!

During this time when all of these thoughts or lessons have been running through my head, I read a section in Repenting of Religion where Gregory Boyd writes about how we descendants of The Fall, want to always have an explanation for the suffering that surrounds us. It makes absolutely no sense to us why tens of thousands of innocent children have died in the last six months from a famine in Africa. Surely behind the failed marriages or crumbling families or impoverished neighbors that we know, there has to be a place to point our fingers or even wag them if we dare! After all, haven't we been taught that we "reap what we sow"?

But Boyd writes this:
"Perhaps nowhere is the fallen impulse to reject ambiguity more evident than in the way religious people tend to interpret suffering. We live in a  morally ambiguous world in which fortune and misfortune come upon people in an arbitrary fashion. Yet the fallen, moralistic impulse to reject ambiguity inclines many to insist that those who suffer misfortune deserve it or that their suffering is morally justified because it serves a higher cosmic purpose. Indeed, these have been the two dominant explanations for evil within the Christian tradition.
It is significant that Jesus never embraced either explanation. Never once did Jesus suggest that any of the multitudes of suffering people to whom he ministered were being punished or disciplined by God through their suffering. Though he constantly ministered to "the dregs of society," never once did he ask an ethical question of them or raise an ethical suspicion about them. Nor did he ever suggest that they were suffering for a greater good. Instead, he uniformly attributed their affliction to demonic forces (e.g., Mark 9:25; Luke 11:14; 13:11-16; cf. Acts 10:38). And his only concern was to manifest the will of his Father by healing and delivering those he confronted."

"Jesus and the authors of the New Testament assumed that the cosmos was much more complex and ambiguous than allowed for by the traditional explanations for evil. They saw the world as under siege by the Accuser, whom they called "the ruler of this world," "the god of this world," and "the ruler of the power of the air" (John 12:31; 14:30; 16:11; 2 Cor. 4:4; Eph. 2:2). While they assumed that every aspect of creation that didn't align itself with the will of God was directly or indirectly the result of fallen human or angelic wills, they never speculated about why things unfold just the way they do. They did not pretend to know much about the virtually infinite chain of influences that lie behind each and every event that takes place. they thus didn't try to penetrate the ambiguity of the world and explain why one person was afflicted, another demonized, another crushed by a fallen tower, and another untouched altogether. They did not try to reject the ambiguity of the world by finding God's will in suffering. They rather worked in the midst of the ambiguity of the world to apply God's will to suffering." (I've underlined exactly what I'd underlined in my book.)

Thanks for bearing with such a long passage. I could not have said it better!

I know with every fiber of my being this is a lesson God's Holy Spirit wants to teach me...for myself and to be shared with others. If I'm going to minister to women...particularly single moms...I can not have an attitude that is contradictory to what Jesus taught. I can not approach the subject of a failed marriage, a rebellious child, a bankrupt portfolio seeking explanations or blame. Do we not see that we just drive ourselves insane trying to explain away the situations for which there is a "virtually infinite chain of influences"?

Holy Spirit brought me face-to-face with this attitude of blame even in myself this morning. I've been beating myself up over an area which I struggle. For days I've been asking why I fail in this time and time again. I've been trying to develop an action plan to avoid being vulnerable, my thoughts have been consumed with blame and how to fix this. And Bless His Name!...this morning, He broke through and I finally listened!

Yes, it was Repenting of Religion again: "Instead of trusting in God to love them and defend them in their sin, Adam and Eve became their own defense attorneys. They trusted their own knowledge of good and evil to protect them rather than trusting God."

And there it was...I don't have the knowledge of all things...good or evil. How can I say that any one person (even myself) is to blame for my struggle...my suffering? [Again, I reiterate...what I'm calling suffering for myself is not anything physical. I speak of a spiritual suffering only in this situation.]

Just so He knew I was listening, He perfectly timed a portion of Jesus Calling today too! "Do not fear your weakness, for it is the stage on which My Power and Glory perform most brilliantly. As you persevere along the path I have prepared for you, depending on My strength to sustain you, expect to see miracles--and you will. Miracles are not always visible to the naked eye, but those who live by faith can see them clearly. Living by faith, rather than sight, enables you to see My Glory."

To the naked eye, another may never see my struggle...my suffering...but when each day I trust Jesus to overcome my weakness with His strength, I am a firsthand witness to His miracles...His Glory.

Now here's the awesomely awesome part...the part He gave me over the weekend and because I wasn't listening very well, was delayed in my fitting it into the bigger puzzle:
"Although the Lord has given you bread of privation and water of oppression, He, your Teacher will no longer hide Himself, but your eyes will behold your Teacher. Your ears will hear a word behind you, "This is the way, walk in it," whenever you turn to the right or to the left. And you will defile your graven images plated with gold. You will scatter them as an impure thing, and say to them, "Be gone!" (Isaiah 30:20-22)

He placed this Scripture passage in my path on Saturday, and I've been thinking about it ever since. I have lived this...I have experienced this very thing. And His promises are always faithful and true! So if during financial devastation I witnessed this intimately...can't I count on Him to apply it to my life this time too? Absolutely!

When you experience suffering of any form or measure (spiritual, physical, mental, emotional, financial, etc.), God wants to be your Teacher. During this suffering, if you train your eyes on your Teacher, He will no longer hide Himself! Amen! That's enough right there, isn't it?! But wait...His Holy Spirit will also whisper in your ears His Word telling you "This is the way, walk in it". You'll know whether to turn right or left.

And the blessed consequence that happens? That's right...all of those idols veneered with silver or gold even...you realize just how false and defiled they are...that they are impure things. My new phrase is that it's "all smoke and mirrors compared to God's reality"! The crazy thing is that in the midst of the suffering...these idols I've clung to...possibly for years...I will finally wake up and say "Be Gone!"

Do you know what I'm talking about? If you've ever allowed God to work in the midst of your suffering, I can guarantee you've experienced this, even if you didn't realize it. Allowing Him full access in the midst of devastation and heartbreak can help you break free from any idol: a relationship; a house; a job; a church; a sin; a guilty pleasure; a hobby; a vice; a painful past; a schedule; a joyless future; an American Dream...any thing we place before our relationship with Him!

So while I fervently believe and pray I will share with myself and others until my last breath that there is definite ambiguity in our suffering, allowing Him to love us through it brings definitively obvious miracles!



**Endnote: I pray what I have written has not contradicted my belief that there is no grand cosmic purpose to our suffering. Rather, my prayer is that you sense God's desire to apply His will and healing to it.**

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I've Taken a Few Days to Chew on This

...but I think it's time to process some more through writing...my favorite form of processing and analyzing (also spares my husband the verbal processing too!). If you don't mind a bit of a ramble that may follow a few rabbit trails...come along for the ride.

I make it sound so pleasurable and fun, don't I? Problem is, when Holy Spirit began whispering this to me on Sunday, I sort of put it on the back burner because this was a lot to swallow. But God is persistent and I'm so thankful He is. While this isn't a fully formed idea yet...and I don't think I'll ever completely reach the depth of what He's saying...no...what He's asking, this is a lesson I need to grasp and I need to grasp quickly and wholeheartedly.

Just look back over that last paragraph at all of the emphases. I told you this was a ride, didn't I?

Here goes!

Sunday, I finished marking the book of Galatians for the inductive Bible study that I'm doing on my own. In my Previous Post of the same name, I mentioned Paul's theme of works versus grace or Law versus faith in Jesus as the only way by which we are redeemed. If you're new to some of this lingo, the simplest way to think of redemption or to be redeemed is exactly what the dictionary says: "to buy or pay off; clear by payment". The death of Jesus the Messiah paid for me, you and everyone that has ever lived. It was a one-time-for-all purchase.

The word grace is a little trickier. There are a lot of definitions for this one, but the two applicable ones are these: "a manifestation of favor, especially by a superior" and "mercy; clemency; pardon". The reason I say this word is "trickier" is because this is the one word that I have seen trip up grown men and children alike. This is the word that our finite, limited human brains, truly cannot grasp. After all, why would the Creator of the universe, put on a lowly human form, come to Earth, take on all of the sin that ever did and ever will exist and die a criminal's death so that all we have to do is say that  we "believe" (remember, that means to "put our trust with" Him!) and then everything is washed away so now we can go live with Him forever in Heaven? Only He can answer that one. Then again, maybe we are making this message too simple? [Stay with me!]

Here's where I got stuck in Galatians: "Those who desire to make a good showing in the flesh try to compel you to be circumcised simply so that they will not be persecuted for the cross of Christ." (Galatians 6:12)

Now, I know most non-Jewish people in the Western world think of circumcision more as just something you do or have done because your doctor told you so, it's more hygienic or because that's just the accepted practice. So don't get hung up on the word circumcised. Please allow me a little leeway to try to bring this into the context of our churches in the American culture. Here's a few possibilities:
"Those who desire to make a good showing (to their church boards) (general superintendents) (missionary board) (church growth subcommittee) try to compel you to (wear certain clothing) (observe certain rules about appearance) (never drink alcohol) (quit smoking the minute you become a Christian) (badger your non-believing husband into coming to church with you) (knock on doors and pass out tracts with steps for salvation) (serve on 6 committees/boards/special programs) (never miss a day of church) (give "sacrificially" to a new multi-million dollar facility) so they will not be persecuted for the cross of Christ."

Have I stepped on anyone else's toes besides mine yet? If you don't hate me now...keep reading!

I am thankful for an amazing God who doesn't just leave me hanging there!!! As I'm chewing on this for two days, He prompts a friend to return a book to me that I haven't had for awhile. He then prompts me on Monday to pick it up and start re-reading it (I think for about the fifth time now...it's that good!). Tuesday morning, in Radical by David Platt, here's what I read:

"The gospel reveals eternal realities about God that we would sometimes rather not face. We prefer to sit back, enjoy our cliches, and picture God as a Father who might help us, all the while ignoring God as a Judge who might damn us. Maybe this is why we fill our lives with the constant drivel of entertainment in our culture--and in our church. We are afraid that if we stop and really look at God in his Word, we might discover that He evokes greater awe and demands deeper worship than we are ready to give Him."

Yes, I wrote in the margin "Ouch!"

Platt goes on: "But this is just the point. We are not ready to give Him what He asks for because our hearts are set against Him. God's revelation in the gospel not only reveals who He is, but it also reveals who we are."

After I read through the next section entitled "Who We Really Are", I wrote this: "Warning! This is raw stuff". I wish I could reprint it all here...but to do so is most likely illegal and would therefore fly in the face of any credibility I'm attempting to have in regard to this topic. I'll attempt to summarize, but by no means can do justice to this message. There are some hard-hitting, yet Biblical realities that I'm not sure we're all ready to hear. Maybe the more accurate observation is that we can't hear them...because to listen to the true Jesus of the Bible is just as scandalous in our American churches today as it was over 2000 years ago in the Middle East. But these are some of the things Platt writes that had me in tears by the end of the section:

"We are each born with an evil, God-hating heart." (reference Genesis 8:21 and  Luke 11:13)

"Many people say, "Well, I have always loved God," but the reality is, no one has. We may have loved a god that we made up in our minds, but the God of the Bible, we hate."

"Everything in all creation responds in obedience to the Creator...until we get to you and me. We have the audacity to look God in the face and say, 'No.'"

"The gospel confronts us with the hopelessness of our sinful condition. But we don't like what we see of ourselves in the gospel so we shrink back from it. We live in a land of self-improvement. Certainly there are steps we can take to make ourselves better. So we modify what the gospel says about us." (emphasis mine)

"We are not evil, we think, and certainly not spiritually dead. Haven't you heard of the power of positive thinking? I can become a better me and experience my best life now. That's why God is there--to make that happen. My life is not going right, but God loves me and has a plan to fix my life. I simply need to follow certain steps, think certain things, and check off certain boxes, and then I am good."

I have to stop quoting before I get sued! But I desperately want to print more. As "in your face" as this is, this book is flying off of bookshelves, being studied and preached about in hundreds of congregations all over the country...can we assume that people are finally exasperatedly exhausted of our American version of  "do-it-yourself" religion?

Platt continues that our diagnosis and our conclusion to actually "do-it-yourself" fits in very nicely with a culture where self-sufficiency, self-esteem, self-confidence, self-discipline...self, self, self...are highly praised, rewarded and even exalted. Isn't this why the poor are looked down upon? After all, in America...we all have the same opportunities for education, working hard, living right and pulling ourselves up by our own bootstraps so anyone can be successful if they just set their mind to it. If you believe that, then you're not going to like me very much when I tell you that's a bunch of hooey! Why?

Platt puts it best: "Meanwhile, the biblical gospel says, "You are an enemy of God, dead in your sin, and in your present state of rebellion, you are not even able to see that you need life, much less to cause yourself to come to life. Therefore, you are radically dependent on God to do something in your life that you could never do." (obviously, emphasis mine!)

Chew on this! Please!

• Do you see that that person who's only ever known abuse and neglect can't possibly get out of that awful relationship because they do not even see that they need life, much less deserve it?
• Do we fully grasp that the drug, alcohol, gossip. slander or sex addict can't possibly stop on their own no matter how many steps they complete without a God who reminds them that they are loved with a boundless love so they are worth giving up that addiction and letting Him satisfy all of the voids they're trying to fill.
• Do we "get" that the chronic welfare recipient doesn't understand that there is another way of life because not only were the educational and financial opportunities unavailable and welfare is all they know...but no one has ever introduced them to the God who says, "You are worth a price more valuable than any government program could ever offer you. You were worth my very life."
• And last, do we trust the Holy Spirit of the God who created everything and everyone to grow them in His time and in His way? Yes, they will stumble...as do we all. Yes, they will return to the comfort of what they know...as do we all. Yes, they may take steps more slowly than our agenda would allow...but growing at God's speed, instead of ours...is the only way they'll even make it to the finish line.

When we begin to grasp this, Platt writes, "Now we are getting to the beauty of the gospel."

I would add...Now we're getting to where there is true freedom in Christ...not some pasted on smile while you're dying inside kind of freedom...but the kind of freedom where you're so downright giddy, people wonder what you've been drinking...the kind of freedom that leaves you breathless when God disciplines (remember, it means simply "to teach") and brings you face-to-face with the ugliness and depravity of your heart and yet, lovingly He says, "C'mon Angela...let Me show you how to change this...you've been trying on your own long enough!"...the kind of freedom that leaves you standing (or sometimes sprawled out on the floor) in awe of a Creator that was nailed to a cross and drank the entire cup of God's wrath so that I can be weightless,  "soar on wings like eagles" and "run and not grow weary" (Isaiah 40:31) Isn't that a gospel that's worth becoming radical about?!

And here's where we come back to what He's asking. You see, if all we have to do is "believe" then is there really any cost? But Jesus said we have to take up our cross and follow Him (Matthew 10:38) so He must have thought it was going to cost us something. That's why I said previously, "maybe we are making the gospel too easy". I guess, the gospel is easy because Jesus does all the work...but it will cost us everything. To teach anything less is not teaching the Truth of who Jesus is and what He demands of us. Now ask yourself, is that the kind of gospel we routinely hear in America today? Something else for you to chew on!

As if Platt's book weren't enough, today in Jesus Calling, I read: "This is the age of self-help. Bookstores abound with books about "taking care of number one,"making oneself the center of all things. The main goal of these methodologies is to become self-sufficient and confident. You, however, have been called to take a "road less traveled": continual dependence on Me. True confidence comes from knowing you are complete in My Presence. Everything you need has its counterpart in Me."

Do you think He's trying to remind me of something? I pray I say this humbly and it is received that way: this time...I don't think I'm the only one He's talking to.

What are you trying to fix yourself? What plans are you trying to make happen? What 5 year goal are you striving for that may never have been God's plan for you to begin with? What joy, love, hope, freedom, sanity and peace have you sacrificed because you've bought into this American lie that YOU are the master of your fate?

Yeah, I've had some people look at me funny when I say I have no "goals" for Boundless Minstries, or that I'm leaving a situation in God's hands so that the Holy Spirit can lead me in His perfect timing to say exactly what needs to be said. But the awareness that "I have been crucified with Christ and I no longer live, but Christ lives in me," (yet another great Galatians verse, 2:20a) is worth everything to me...no matter how "Radical" I seem!

Amen!

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I Have a Confession...

I am a grumbler!

Now, to those of you that know me...this is no great revelation. But I am so thankful and grateful to a God who knows our flaws, reveals them to us and patiently waits for us to be confronted with His awesome Truth so we can get about the business of ridding our lives of these flaws that do not reflect Him.

Such was my morning today. Although I've known for years, if not decades, that this is one of my greatest flaws, I have often felt helpless to change this very deep-rooted issue. I mean it's so deep that it goes back three generations before me that I know of...possibly more. I've always known that being critical is one of my biggest hangups and that it can very easily manifest itself as depression, negativity, pessimism,  dissension, strife, gossip and anger. And while God has patiently and lovingly worked on each of these areas in my life, I became distinctly aware this morning just how pervasive my grumbling is. I even confessed to God that to cut this out of my life will be like losing a close relative. I know warped, right?

I kept thinking all of the nitpicking & fighting that my kids do has got to stop...and it does...but yesterday and today, I came face to face with how I am the root of this whole issue. My grumbling, my ranting, my negativity paints a picture for my family that they mold themselves into. And while I may be completely justified in most of my criticism, it makes everyone else in our family look through lenses of doubt, criticism and negativity...and that is not how God wants us to live.

So this was the revelation for today and why I believe Holy Spirit has brought me to the final crossroads on this issue. From this point forward, I cannot deny the Truth, I cannot pretend I do not know. No...today, I have to choose to walk in the Light of His Truth or stand in direct disobedience to Him (yes, sin!). And as I fervently prayed this morning, "Lord, I want to be a doer of the Word...not just a hearer. Give me a teachable spirit because I don't want to continue living this way."

In Jesus Calling, I read: "You have been on a long, uphill journey, and your energy is almost spent. Though you have faltered at times, you have not let go of My hand. I am pleased with your desire to stay close to Me. There is one thing, however, that displeases Me: your tendency to complain. You may talk to Me as much as you like about the difficulty of the path we are following. I understand better than anyone else the stresses and strains that have afflicted you. You can ventilate safely to Me, because talking with Me tempers your thoughts and helps you see things from My perspective.

Complaining to others is another matter altogether. It opens the door to deadly sins such as self-pity and rage. Whenever you are tempted to grumble, come to Me and talk it out. As you open up to Me, I will put My thoughts in your mind and My song in your heart." (I've underlined the portions that hit me square between the eyes.)

Yes...I do want to have His thoughts in my mind and His song in my heart! And I want my kids to quit grumbling...so it has to start with me, right? Right!

Just so neither I, nor anyone else can say that the passage above is merely a woman's rambling thoughts, I love that the author puts Scripture references on each page. Today's were exactly the ones with which I needed to be confronted. Jeremiah 31:25 "For I satisfy the weary ones and refresh everyone who languishes." and Philippians 2:14-15 "Do all things without grumbling or disputing; so that you will prove yourselves to be blameless and innocent, children of God above reproach in the midst of a crooked and perverse generation, among whom you appear as lights in the world."

In my Bible, the Jeremiah passage has a cross reference to Jeremiah 31:12-14 which says God's bounty will make me radiant, my soul will have abundance and I can be satisfied with God's goodness. So each day, as I'm looking at what we have (or don't have), I need to talk to God about my concerns, frustrations, etc. and He "tempers your thoughts and helps you see things from My perspective." (Jesus Calling) From God's perspective, I have enough for today. Amen!

The Philippians passage had a cross reference to 1 Corinthians 10:10 which is referring to the Israelites and how their grumbling caused the destroyer to destroy them. Yikes! There have been days recently when I feel like our family is being destroyed by the grumbling and complaining. And where have they learned it? Who has set the standard? Yep...it's me!

And a direct reference to being a child of God is Ephesians 5:1, "Therefore be imitators of God, as beloved children..." To imitate God and demonstrate myself as His child means to give up the grumbling right? Of course! What is the result? “You are the light of the world. A city set on a hill cannot be hidden; ¹⁵ nor does anyone light a lamp and put it under a basket, but on the lampstand, and it gives light to all who are in the house. ¹⁶ Let your light shine before men in such a way that they may see your good works, and glorify your Father who is in heaven. (Matthew 5:14-16)

There it is. I've even experienced recently the pure shock at being confronted with another critical person at my tax prep classes. I came away from that experience realizing just how much God has changed me already. But now it's time to go even deeper...so that the ones who know me best and see me the most recognize the difference of the Holy Spirit in my life...particularly in the area of grumbling and complaining.

Now our church is all about making yourself accountable to someone when there's an area in your life where you want to grow and change. So today, I sat down with the four people who know me best and know my worst. These four have put up with a lot from me over the course of their young lives...and yet, they love me still. So who better to hold me accountable than my kids.

I realize I've set myself up to be corrected by my children...and I've asked them to do it in a kind, loving way...but even if they harshly reprimand me when I grumble, I pray that as I'm humbled by the reminder, I will remain thankful to a God who knows my every flaw and yet doesn't grumble against me. I pray that as Holy Spirit changes me,  my children will sense the change and the prevailing attitude of criticism to each other is healed. But most of all, I just pray that I become such a good imitator of God that no one doubts I am His child.

A Gentle Reminder for Me

It's taken me two days to work through a one day lesson in Living Beyond Yourself. And it's been God's gentle reminder to me, right when I need it. His little love notes of assurance continue to strengthen my faith exactly at the right time.

"We live in a culture motivated by one major goal-- a little more. We work too hard and make too little. We have more than enough to live complicated lives, but less than enough to be contented." Isn't it interesting (or maybe just plain amazing!) that Beth Moore puts into words about 7 years ago precisely what I've been learning over the last 2 1/2 years? Coincidence? I think not!

God is calling each of us to this place of surrendering everything...absolutely everything. And what I'm sensing over and over again is this undercurrent in our American churches that there just has to be more than what we've allowed ourselves to believe. Books being written by Francis Chan, David Platt, Donald Miller, Shane Claiborne, Rich Stearns and others; entire churches going through books like Crazy Love, Radical and studies in James and Philippians that are making them call into question exactly where their priorities (and thus, money) should be placed; as well as, the discontent that I hear, see and read in so many lives that just know there has to be more to this life, makes me ask, "God what are You doing? This is not random...I know! You are creating a groundswell of Your people that desire above all else to be sold out and surrendered to You and You alone. What amazing things do You have planned?"

I know I'm going to offend some people here, but capitalism is NOT the teaching of Jesus. I watched a documentary a few months ago from a very liberal filmmaker in which he interviewed a few priests about this question..."Is capitalism Christian?" Without hesitation the priest, the bishop and the archbishop each said "No!" 'And in fact, it's often the exact opposite,' they added.

Have we allowed ourselves to confuse capitalism with democracy? Capitalism is a grasping for more...the opposite of what Jesus lived and taught. While democracy is freedom. Obviously, democracy is much more in tune with what Jesus offered us...possibly that's why so many nations fight and die for it!? And maybe God's creating a discontentment with chasing after "things" in His people so that we'll shake it off and get angry enough with the evil and injustice in the world to stand up and say "Enough! No matter the cost, no matter the pain, no matter the shame, I will serve the LORD!"

These past two days, Beth Moore's study guided me to Ecclesiastes, a book written by King Solomon and it's not a pretty picture of a rich man's reflections. As Dale said last night, Christian financial gurus like to quote all of the cute little phrases from Proverbs about how amassing wealth is wise and only the foolish live for the day...but these "gurus" don't often quote the reflective Solomon that in his old age said things like,

(Okay, I just have to insert the irony here that my iPod just randomly started playing, "Money, Money, Money", the Abba song from Mama Mia. Ha! Father, You have a great sense of humor!!!)

"Meaningless! Meaningless!
Says the Teacher (Solomon)
Utterly meaningless!
Everything is meaningless!" (Ecc. 1:2)

"I have seen all things that are done under the sun; all of them are meaningless, a chasing after the wind." (Ecc. 1:14)

"Then I hated all my labor in which I had toiled under the sun, because I must leave it to the man who will come after me. And who knows whether he will be wise or a fool?" (Ecc. 2:18-19a)

"The sleep of a laboring man is sweet,
Whether he eats little or much;
But the abundance of the rich will not permit him to sleep.

There is severe evil which I have seen under the sun;
Riches kept for their owner to his hurt.
But those riches perish through misfortune;
When he begets a son, there is nothing in his hand.
As he came from his mother's womb, naked shall he return,
To go as he came;
And he shall take nothing from his labor
Which he may carry away in his hand." (Ecc. 5:12-15)

As I read the beginning of this chapter 5 passage to Dale last night, he said, 'I can verify that (about sweet sleep). Since I've left Fifth Third, I've probably only had five to ten nights that I had trouble sleeping. When I was at Fifth Third, I lost a lot of sleep.'

How can a couple that doesn't know where the rent money will come from have sweet sleep? Only when we believe God at His Word!

But even back in Proverbs, King Solomon said this,

"Better is a little with the fear of the LORD,
Thank great treasure with trouble.
Better is a dinner of vegetables where love is,
Than a fatted calf with hatred." (Prov. 15:16-17)

You better believe I just put verse 17 on our dining area white board...one MORE proof to my kids that vegetarianism or veganism is the way to go! Hah!

But seriously, if you just look at this without strict application to dietary guidelines, I WAS for years feeding my children with the "fat of the calf" yet instilling in them bitterness and hatred and even a compulsion to have more. When we began to have little or in this verse, "vegetables" I can truly say there is MUCH more love in our home! I'm not focused on taking care of "stuff" as much as I used to be...which frees up more energy just to be a wife, mother and child of God.

A dear friend said to me last summer when we were trying to get rid of the garage space we were renting "Just the mental energy it takes to keep track of all that stuff is exhausting!" And she was right. How many times have a yelled at my kids over the years for not taking care of their "stuff"? When really, isn't taking care of our souls, hearts and minds for God MUCH more important??

At the end of this lesson, I read an amazing passage in I Timothy 6:6-10: "6 Now godliness with contentment is great gain. 7 For we brought nothing into this world, and it is certain we can carry nothing out. 8 And having food and clothing, with these we shall be content. 9 But those who desire to be rich fall into temptation and a snare, and into many foolish and harmful lusts which drown men in destruction and perdition. 10 For the love of money is a root of all kinds of evil, for which some have strayed from the faith in their greediness, and pierced temselves through with many sorrows."

Now, I have heard verse 10 discussed many times. And Christians are always quick to point out that it's the "love of money" not the money itself that is the root of all kinds of evil. I guess I'd first point out that I don't think I've EVER heard this verse taught in the context of the preceding four verses, but, I also take issue with this theory. While grammatically, it's a true statement, I've never known anyone that struggled with the "love" of money, unless they had too much of it to spare. And believe me, this is directed back at myself too!!

I really don't know that many very wealthy people...but I know a whole lot of people that have way more than enough.

And what does Paul say in verse 8? "And having food and clothing, with these we shall be content." Even in our economically depressed circumstances, I can't honestly say that this is true for me. I notice he didn't include a home (or even shelter!) in this statement. Could that be because Paul knew God would provide a place with fellow believers for him to sleep or it just wasn't a priority? After all, if the "Son of Man has no place to lay His head" (Luke 9:58) as a follower of the Son of Man, why would Paul expect any differently?? Yes, this IS a scary thought for a mother with four children and truthfully, I'm still struggling with the thought that it IS possible to sink even lower than we already have.

In the meantime, as long as God allows, we will continue to endeavor to give out of the little bit of abundance that we have. For this week, it's buying some items for a Alabama Tornado Disaster Relief that our church is doing. Wow! Just when I think my situation is pitiable, I see others with even less than we have. We really are blessed, aren't we?

And Beth Moore concludes the day with these words of promise and hope: "He knows our needs. He knows our vulnerabilities. He knows what we can endure...yet remain faithful. All things are His to give and His to take, but never ours to pursue. Our is to gladly recieve and gladly return."

"Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own." (Matthew 6:34)
Amen!

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